The Gift

Have you ever thought it would be easier to believe in Jesus or follow Him if you had been with him while he was here on earth?  I’ve often envied the disciples and those who spent time with him.  However, as I’ve been meditating in the gospel of John recently, I’m reminded that Jesus doesn’t agree with me on this.  He actually said it is better for us that He was going away because of a gift He would send us.  The gift of the Holy Spirit (John 16:7).  In John 14-16 Jesus  gives several reason why this will be better. The Spirit will guide us into all Truth.  He will be our Advocate, Comforter, Counselor, Helper and Intercessor. The Holy Spirit won’t just be with us, He will be in us. 24/7.  When Jesus was here he was limited to touching those within the region where he lived, the Spirit however, will minister to believers on every corner of the globe----simultaneously!

Another thing Jesus said about this gift of the Spirit is that in spite of His activity, the world will not recognize Him because they aren’t looking for him. In a fresh way this Christmas I am thanking Jesus not just for coming to earth, but for sending us the person of the Holy Spirit when He left.  As a response, I want one of my gifts to Jesus to be that I more actively look and listen to what His Spirit is saying and doing; that I will quickly obey His promptings and follow His lead. Thank you Jesus for the gift of your Holy Spirit!

Exposed, Yet Safe

As we have studied Genesis this fall I got stuck on the story of Noah and his sons. Not the most renowned chapters pertaining to the flood and the ark, but the account of this family following their return to life on land. In Genesis 9:18-27 we learn that once settled, Noah tried his hand at farming. He plants and harvests a vineyard and from the fruit of his labour discovers – and perhaps initiates – the art of wine making. One day he does some ‘extreme’ wine tasting which leads to Noah’s spiral in to an intoxicated state of drunkenness, and lies naked in his tent. His youngest son Ham enters Noah’s tent and finds his dad in this disturbing and exposed situation. Without doing anything to help his father’s circumstances, Ham walks out and shares what he has just seen with his older brothers Shem and Japheth. Without hesitation the older brothers drape a robe over their shoulders, walk backwards into Noah’s tent, and cover their father’s nakedness, not allowing their eyes to fall upon Noah’s exposed, weak and vulnerable state. When Noah awoke from his stupor and learns of Ham’s actions, he curses Ham’s offspring, bestowing a sentence of judgement upon them.

As I prayerfully thought through this text my mind was drawn to each of the four characters: Noah, Ham, and the older brothers, and I found myself relating to all four of them.

I have been in Noah’s circumstances in that there have been times when I have figuratively been vulnerable, exposed and weak before others. Times when I have willingly bared my soul, my past, thoughts, or fears with another and they in turn have left my presence and shared it with other people. As a result I have felt judged, betrayed and exploited in the process.

Sadly I can also relate to Ham where I have been the one who has been entrusted with an intimate moment in another’s life and did not steward it well. I have done nothing to help them but rather I too have left the scene and shared inappropriate information with others, violating trust. Their openness and rawness was not safe in my presence. How I regret and repent over my unloving and ungracious actions.
Like the brothers, I have been the third party, where confidential information has been divulged to me about someone. The question is what was my response? Did I eagerly participate in the conversation or did I instead do what I could to honour and respect, defend and cover, guard and protect the other person? While my desire is to follow the example of the Shem and Japheth, I know that hasn’t always been the case.

As I pondered this text I realized how extremely damaging this can be. Whenever we choose to replicate Ham’s actions, a wall of relational distrust is built amongst us. Overtime we learn it is not safe to expose ourselves, to be raw or vulnerable with others. We avoid entering in to community for fear of being wounded, yet again. We live isolated, masked and at arm’s length to others. As a result we miss out on authentic, deep and real community – the very essence of what God created us to enjoy and thrive within.

Dear Lord Jesus, from this day forward may our words, thoughts and actions prove that we can be trusted and that others are safe in, and out, of our presence. Heal us from past relational hurts and enable us to risk and trust again. Convict us when we are tempted to violate this principle. Amen.

Last weekend's benediction

A couple people told me they found last weekend's benediction meaningful, and asked if I would post it here. I'm happy to do that, so here it is:

“ In the name of the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit, I press the cross into you. As you receive it may you be humbled by God’s capacity for grace. May you rest in the knowledge that you are blessed by God and in His eyes, counted among the first-born.

May you be used by God to bring scandalous, intervening grace to the lives of others. May you bless those who don’t seek it or you think don’t deserve it. And may you seize the opportunities that abound to bless those you love, especially those who long to receive your blessing.

And may His word continue to give you strength for today, and hope for tomorrow. Amen.

Have a great week and don't forget to pray for our troops, and reflect on those who have sacrificed for us. "Lest we forget..."

Need A Vacation?

One of my favourite Bible verses is Psalm 46:10 “Be still and know that I am God”.  One of my favourite authors is Philip Yancey. This week these two faves came together in a book Yancey wrote, entitled Prayer:  Does it Make Any Difference?  In it he talks about the fact that this little verse contains two powerful, life-giving commands.  The first is “Be still...”  He explains that the Latin imperative for “be still” is vacate.   As Simon Tugwell explains, “God invites us to take a holiday [vacation], to stop being God for a while, and let him be God”. Sounds inviting doesn’t it?  In North America we live in a time of affluence and ease and yet stillness and personal peace have maybe never been more absent. Our frenzied pace often means that even vacation time isn’t really marked by inner calm and refreshment.  My husband and I struggle with holiday time not being just a different to-do list.  I find this command to be still very inviting... but how do we stop the craziness?  I wonder if the second command isn’t the key to being able to carry out the first.

“Be still and know that I am God”. In North America one of our badges of honour is self-sufficiency.  We are conditioned to believe that your best and safest bet is to be in a position where you don’t need anyone else. Be master of your fate and maker of your destiny.  From the time we are toddlers “I can do it myself” is our mantra. While there is of course a necessary, healthy side to this there is also an insidious dark side which is reflective of what happened in the Garden of Eden. Adam and Eve decided they would like to switch roles and move from dependent receivers to independent controllers.  Yancey says, “To let God be God, of course, means climbing down from my own executive chair of control.”  God is God.  He is in the heavens and He is in control.  Scripture is clear that when I choose to follow Christ, to be a Christian, I am choosing to reverse the decision that Adam and Eve made. I relinquish control back to God.  I enter a place of full-dependence. I let God be God and let Him run the universe and my life. It’s tough to do, but every time I get a taste of releasing control and just being a child of my Heavenly Father I want more.  What about you?  Time for a vacation?

Steak or Spam

Recently, as I read through Genesis 4 and the account of Cain and Abel I was drawn to verses 2- 4 (NLT): “When they grew up, Abel became a shepherd, while Cain cultivated the ground. When it was time for the harvest, Cain presented some of his crops as a gift to the Lord. Abel also brought a gift – the best of the firstborn lambs from his flock.”

What stood out to me from the text were two words: some…and best. Cain presented ‘some’ of his crops as a gift and offering to God, while Abel offered the ‘best’ of his flock.

I am from a farming background. My Dad was a grain farmer so I can easily relate to Cain’s grain offering. I recall that at harvest time the circumference of the field and the outside edge was generally the worst part of the crop. This area typically yielded the least return, produced the poorest quality of grain and had the greatest influx of weeds. It was often trampled, wind-blown and scorched. And while it produced ‘some’ grain  it generally contributed the least to the harvest. So much so in fact that in some cases Dad would invite a neighboring rancher to come and bail this part of the crop for cattle feed. It wasn’t worth the fuel it took to get in off the field. It was not too difficult, costly or much of a sacrifice to offer up and give away this portion of the harvest.

Contrast that with Abel’s offering of the lamb…the ‘best’ lamb. Although farmers, my family was not into cattle farming. However, each fall my parents would purchase a full ¼ or ½ of beef and have it cut, wrapped and put into the freezer to last my family through the winter months. All of us knew that there was one meal out of that batch of meat that we wanted to show up for…T-bone steak night. In our opinion, the ultimate cut from that animal. The loin the most tender, the meat next to the bone the tastiest. Mom would fry it up on the stove - in Crisco oil - and it was a feast adequate for a king. Delicious, mouthwatering, the very best!! No one wanted to miss out, be late or absent when T-bone was on the menu. At times Mom would invite others to join us for that special meal. It was always a very special opportunity when we were able to honor others by sharing and giving the very best we had to offer.

As I compared those two scenarios of offerings I thought about my life, my ultimate offering to God... and I asked myself whether I give God ‘some’ of my life, or the ‘best’ of my life? Do I offer up ‘some’ of my time, energy and resources… but stop before it begins to cost me personally? Do I offer my King steak or spam? Do I serve sacrificially or beneficially? Do I give God the best parts of all of me or do I withhold big chunks for self comfort, self preoccupation and self control?

Lord Jesus, I want to give you the very best I have every day…all day. Forgive me for the times I have kept the best for my selfish pleasure. Show me how to give away my life…the best of my life…for You and your Kingdom cause. Amen.

Siblings

The other night my husband and I watched the CBC program, “The Passionate Eye”. I know that doesn’t sound very exciting but I found myself getting more and more engaged as they chronicled the story of JoEllen, a young woman who desperately wanted to find the anonymous donor who helped bring her into existence. As the story unfolded not only did she, through amazing circumstances,  find “Donor 150” (her biological father) and have the opportunity to meet him, but she also found 12 half-siblings! It was amazing to watch as these siblings met each other for the first time. The bond was incredible and the family resemblance unmistakable, the eyes, a hand gesture,  the way they fiddled with their hair and their artistic bent. As I watched my thoughts turned to the beautiful and sometimes surprising connection we share as children of God. I’m amazed when it happens with someone I met at church, in my own culture but it is even more surprising when it is in another country and you don’t speak the same language. Recently a friend shared with me that during his summer travels he met a complete stranger and very quickly found himself wondering whether that person was a believer, part of the family.  And sure enough --- he was. What is it? Why do we have this feeling, this sense? Firstly,  I think it is the Holy Spirit alive in each of us. Romans 8:16,17  “The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children”.  I also think part of it is the family resemblance. Traits we know to be true of our Heavenly Father that we see in them. Hebrews 2:11 says “Both the one who makes people holy and those who are made holy are of the same family. So Jesus is not ashamed to call them brothers and sister.” What a gift to be part of this amazing family that is spread all over the globe with Christ as our big brother and God as our Father. Talk about a sense of belonging! And can you imagine the party in heaven when we meet ALL the siblings! 

Child of God

Recently I was reading from Luke 2, the story of Jesus as a baby and a young boy at the temple. I was pondering what it must have been like for Jesus’ parents to manage the existing tensions of their son being fully God and fully human. On the one hand, seeing Him experience physical and intellectual growth as any normal human child would have, but also experiencing the supernatural favor of God in his everyday life in unusual and increasing measure.

I thought about Mary treasuring Jesus’ development, growth and maturity in her heart. No doubt she reflected on her encounters and conversations with the angel, Elizabeth, Simeon and Anna…all who verified that Jesus was the incarnate Son of God. Knowing in her heart His true identity and yet did she ever struggle with what she knew to be truth and what she saw playing out before her in their families day to day lives?

As Jesus’ parents I imagine there would have been moments of sheer awe and anticipation at the understanding of who their son was. Conflicting with moments of deep awareness that He was human, and so were they. I imagine they encountered insecurity in knowing that they with their limited human experience, capacity and ability they had been entrusted  to raise this God child. 

As I pondered  the text, I reflected on my role as a Mom and one who often struggles with tensions and insecurities of parenting in 2011. I asked myself whether in those moments of day to day living, when loving and parenting is stressful and difficult, do I remember that my children are a gift from God, a miracle in the making, and created in the likeness of Christ? A child of God. When I am frustrated with their seeming lack of growth and maturity do I remember that God is at work in their lives and He will complete the good work He has begun? When I am questioning their choices or decisions do I remind myself that God is Sovereign and has a destiny for each of His beloved children? And, He is the Master of taking circumstances, choices along with their consequences and utilizing them to draw His children to Himself.

When I am overwhelmed with my lacking of insight, wisdom, discernment as a parent….the list goes on…do I draw on the fact that God promises to work through my weakness’ and He is able to do more that I can humanly dream or imagine? The question I ultimately asked myself is how do I manage the tension of parenting my child in the midst of his/her humanity intertwined with their true identity as a son, or daughter, of God? 

As I pondered all those thoughts in my heart I found myself thumbing through the pages of my Bible, to 1 Cor 13, commonly referred to as the love chapter, my eyes fell to verse 13. “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”
I smiled to myself and thanked God for His Word. When it comes to my children I must hold to faith and remain sure of what I hope for and certain of what I do not see unfolding before me. I need constant hope that Christ who began a good work is faithful to carry it on to completion, right up until Christ’s return. And the greatest and most important thing I can choose…always… is to love. To love my children as Christ loves. And to remember that as much as I love my children…God loves them more. They are His children, loaned to me for a season, a privilege and responsibility that I must steward well but with ultimate dependence on God. 

I Saw the Most Beautiful Thing...

This September I will have worked at SPAC for two years. In this time I have gotten to be a part of many different experiences and work with all kinds of different people.  This last Saturday however I got to do something for the very first time. I officiated a wedding.  This was both very exciting and somewhat nerve raking. It seems everyone has a good “wedding story”. You know the type, the ones where people feint or the groom’s pants fall down. The rings fall into a crack on the stage or the Pastor announces the happy couple for the first time by the wrong name... Growing up with Pastors all around me in the family tree I have certainly heard my share of these horror stories.

It is with these in my mind, which were once sources of laughter but on that day the instruments of fear, I entered the church Saturday morning.  There are certainly many stories to tell of that day however there is one story that I will most remember.

It isn’t that I arrived Saturday morning to find water pouring in through the floor in the auditorium.

It isn’t during the ceremony when the bride asked if I had a tissue and I responded, “I do... not I do, I do, but I do”

No it isn’t at the reception when the bouquet was tossed... into the ceiling fan that chopped those flowers up!

No, the story that I will most remember is the look of a young man and a young woman who are most certainly in love. What a gift from our God!  Not only the gift of love, not only that person who we feel connected to but the idea of marriage.

Having the best seat in the house while two declare their love for each other in front of friends, family and God, I was struck with how truly immense the gift of marriage is.

Saturday was more than just a new experience for me,  it was a moment which caused me to add yet another reason to thank God for his goodness to us.

Problems in large church?!

I had a conversation with a friend today that made me think about the problems associated with large churches.

I happen to believe that God wants to use churches of all sizes and shapes to accomplish what he wants to accomplish in our world. Sometimes larger churches have certain advantages, and I think small and mid-sized churches have their advantages too. Since our church is considered by some to be in the larger category, it might be worth out time to think about what this means for us. Could some of these be our blind spots?

For example, sometimes large church leaders have attitude problems. We might be tempted to think that because we're bigger, we must be better. Or more successful. The culture of large church often creates a path that leads toward hubris. Like that word? Hubris has to do with pride and arrogance. Filthy traits.

There's institutional complexity in the large church. All the 'stuff' in the website and in the weekend bulletin can easily create the wrong idea. If we're not careful, we'll start to believe that a lot of ministry activity equals ministry effectivness. That's hardly the case.

Some people like large church because they want to be anonymous. It's fairly easy to 'hide' in a crowd, and that's why some people like churches like ours. A more critical conclusion is that a crowd inhibits opportunities to be known or loved. Is there any chance we have to own this one?

Large churches often get caught up in feeding the monster. "Feeding the monster" is the constant temptation to try to out due the last thing. Larger churches are often known for polished worship sets and extraordinary holiday and special event services. Pull off a great weekend or a jaw dropping Christmas Eve service and the next question is, "How are we going to top that?" Unfortunately, try we do.

But the most sober question that went through my mind today was this one: Is it possible that we're a big fat church that doesn't need God anymore?

There's never a shortage of demands our staff and leaders. My own 'to do' list is never ending. There are weekend services to prepare for, people to care for, meetings to attend, and budgets to prepare. This is the world of large church.

But what are we doing that requires radical dependence on God and His Spirit? If my 'to do' list doesn't drop me to my knees and draw me to prayer, maybe most of my list is goofy.

So that's what I'm thinking about today. What's our church engaged in that requires radical dependence? Want to pray into that with me? Only one rule: It can't be a building program!

Ruthless Trust

In his book, Ruthless Trust, Brennan Manning speaks of a man named John Kavanaugh, a brilliant man who went to work for three months at “the house of the dying” in Calcutta. John Kavanaugh went seeking a clear answer to how best spend the rest of his life. On the first morning, there in the gutters of Calcutta, John met Mother Theresa. She asked him, “What can I do for you?” He paused to think and then asked if she would pray for him. “What do you want me to pray for?” she wondered. He voiced the request that he had borne thousands of miles from the United States: “Pray," he said, "that I have clarity.” She said firmly, “No, I will not do that.” Her abrupt response took him back. When he asked why not, she told him, “Clarity is the last thing you are clinging to and must let go of.” When Mr. Kavanaugh commented that she always seemed to have the kind of clarity he longed for, she laughed out loud and said, “I have never had clarity; what I have always had is trust. So I will pray that you trust God.”

Unwavering trust is a rare and precious thing. Most of us know more than what we will ever put into practice, we’ve got enough insights to last a hundred years. What we lack is trust. We lack the courage to take the next step that is in front of us. We want the whole picture, the entire road map, we want to see the final destination and all the turns we will take to get there. Like John Kavanaugh, we are addicted to clarity but what we need is to trust…childlike trust in the Father’s active goodness and unrestricted love.

Brennan Manning wisely points out that when we trust we often do so with a bit of an agenda, presuming that our trust will result in God dispelling our confusion, illuminating the darkness, and clearing all uncertainty. Hebrews 11 reminds us that this is not the case. Our trust does not bring final clarity to our circumstances. It does not still the chaos or dull the pain or provide a crutch. When all else is unclear, the heart of trust says, as Jesus did on the cross, “Into your hands I commit my spirit.” (Luke 23:46).

"Good"

I have been thinking about this word a lot lately. Statements like “God is good, life is good, you are good are ones that we hear often and maybe we react and with sarcasm say, “Ya right!”

We read verses from the Bible like “All things work together for good” (Romans 8:28) or “He who began a good work in you will carry it on to completion until the day of Christ Jesus.” (Phil 1:6)



What does the word mean to you? When the Bible uses it, what does it mean?

In my limited knowledge of life I have come to realize that it is indeed very, very limited. My knowledge compared to God’s knowledge, there is no comparison. So when God uses the word “good” like the “good work” He is doing in me, I am not able to fully appreciate the significance of His perspective of “good”.

Sometimes I don’t like his perspective. I am hard of hearing, have cancer (that is in remission) suffer from arthritis, deal with self identity, have struggles with relationships and self discipline. Is God really doing a “good work” in me?

Yes, because I am,  as the term that we hear often says, “a good work in progress”. Of course, this is from God’s point of view.

How about you? What is the “good work” that God is doing in you? Or is this concept “so heavenly that it is of no earthly good”? There is that word “good” again!

Deliver Us From Amnesia

I have always been fascinated by stories in which the main character suffers from amnesia. We all know how it goes, because they can’t remember their past, they’ve lost their identity. They have no context for their existence. They are isolated and alone. I’m captivated by their intense search for clues that will give them any hint as to who they are. They are consumed by this quest. Maybe I’m so easily drawn into these stories because, if I’m honest, on some other level, I ask the same kinds of questions...  who am I? Why am I here? How does my short little life fit within the grander scheme of things?

God’s word the Bible has given me some answers and although I certainly don’t have it all figured out here’s two things I’m learning to stand on with greater certainty all the time.

Firstly, God’s Word reminds me that my primary identity is as a child of God. “See how very much our heavenly Father loves us, for He allows us to be called His children, and we really are” I John 3:1. He created me, redeemed me and loves me all the time, even though I don’t deserve it. What a relief to know that it’s not what I do, how well I perform or what I achieve. This identity is a gift that I have received through Jesus. He promises He will never change how He feels towards me. Talk about security! He has also promised that He is always with me so I never need to fear being alone. Do I ever forget my identity? Many times, but as I continue to take God at His word, my bouts with “amnesia” are becoming less frequent. And it doesn’t end there….

Another way that God continues to help me be at ease with who I am is by helping me view my life as part of a bigger story. My story isn’t limited to the context of my parents, grandparents and known family tree. As a child of God I’m part of a much bigger story that includes all the men and women of faith who have gone before me, and all those who will come after me. Whenever I’m having an “amnesia” moment---feeling isolated in my journey with God---all that I need to do is to go to a part of the Bible like Hebrews 11 where I find a list of fellow participants in this great story. When you glance down the list some of these folks saw incredible miracles---like the Red Sea parting and the walls of Jericho falling---of course we’d all like to have a part like that in the story. Others however, saw nothing but hardship and suffering.  What God saw was their faith.   That gives me great comfort because again, its not performance and spectacular results that God is after, it’s faith. Day by day surrendering to Him, doing my best to be obedient and leaving the rest in Him hands. I’m a child of God and part of a great community of faith, each of us with a small but significant role in God’s great story. So let’s face each day with confidence in our identity…and on days we don’t…. God deliver us from amnesia!

Chosen by Grace

Every once in a while I’m drawn to a collection of Christian poetry my parents gave me as a college graduation present. I have no idea what inspired them to select this particular book; yet (at the risk of further entrenching my reputation as an “artsy type”), I must admit that it has become one of my most treasured possessions.
 
There’s something about this particular book that speaks to my soul—something in the thoughtfully-chosen words and well-crafted metaphors that resonates so deeply within me that the pages somehow seem to express my own thoughts, my own feelings—my own story.

Perhaps that’s why this poem struck (and still strikes) me so powerfully.

CONVERSION

He was a born loser,
accident-prone too;
never won a lottery,
married a girl who
couldn’t cook, broke
his leg the day before
the wedding
and forgot the ring.
He was the kind
who ended up behind a post
in almost any
auditorium. Planes
he was booked to fly on
were delayed
by engine trouble
with sickening regularity.
His holidays at the beach
were almost always
ruined by rain. All
his apples turned out
wormy. His letters
came back marked
“Moved, left no
address.” And it was
his car that was cited
for speeding
from among a flock of others
going 60 in a
55 mile zone.

So it was a real shocker
when he found himself
elected, chosen by Grace
for Salvation, felt
the exhilaration of
an undeserved and wholly
unexpected Joy
and tasted, for the
first time, the Glory
of being on
the winning side.

Luci Shaw, 20th century

Although most of the hardships mentioned in the poem have likely never literally happened to you or me (for example, let me make it clear before I end up sleeping on the couch tonight that my wife is a very good cook), what is being expressed touches the inmost core of our beings. Like holding our hand up in an invisible “L” against our foreheads all day long, we all have a strong sense of our own inadequacies, failures and missteps. And, while the world exhorts us to become experts at masking these things with success, possessions and power, God invites us to embrace these things and allow them to do what they are meant to do—unmask our need for Jesus and what He accomplished on the cross.

So be courageous today. Acknowledge your shortcomings. Accept that you are limited. And let God shock you with the realization that, in spite of everything, you are chosen by grace. Feel the “exhilaration of an undeserved and wholly unexpected Joy.” You are on the winning side.

“For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” (John 3:17 NIV)

Exposed

I know a girl, we will call her Zoe. She had a boyfriend she dated for over a year. During their time together she had taken photos of herself only meant for his eyes.
When the relationship ended he was left feeling angry and bitter, so he sent these photos to one of her professors. For those of you unaware, this is not taken lightly at Universities. Zoe was reported to the academic Dean. The ripples of this action she could not stop. She was called in to the Dean’s office and had to explain how these photos were sent to her professor, she had to explain to her parents why the Dean’s office was calling the house. And after all this she still had to still go and sit in that class in front of that professor. Each part of the story she had to tell all the facts she never wanted anyone to know about. She had to look at those starring eyes, eyes that she could not hide from. She wanted to cover up, but she had been exposed, she had nowhere to hide.

As a young boy I was told the day of judgement would go like this; I would be led to this place and a chair would be there. I would then sit down and have to watch the movie of my life, everyone I knew would be there watching. I would have to watch every detail, every moment I had tried to forget, every moment I have tried to cover up, everyone moment I had spent my entire life trying to cover up. But the veil finally came off and then I was exposed. I was left standing there, nothing to hide behind, just like Zoe.

In those thoughts I wonder if anyone could even accept me, I have already decided no one could love me. I am standing there, just like Zoe exposed and ashamed. You know the feeling; you know this feeling I am talking about. Whether it has come when you have had to confess what you have done, or have been caught in an act. Or maybe this feeling comes when you are with a significant other who is ashamed to be with you. Or maybe you have put yourself on the line; have tried and failed for everyone to see. We all know what it is like to be standing there.

"I delight greatly in the LORD; my soul rejoices in my God. For he has clothed me with garments of salvation and arrayed me in a robe of his righteousness, as a bridegroom adorns his head like a priest, and as a bride adorns herself with her jewels." Isaiah 61:10

When God speaks such words how can I not be drawn to Jesus?  Zoe’s story is our story. Zoe’s story is Jesus’ story.  It’s why we are drawn to the cross, why we can be with someone who knows our shame and who can take away our shame. After all, who wants to be left standing there?

She was exposed for all to see. All eyes focused on a photo never meant for them.

It was the day before my 7th birthday, there was a block garage sale going on. There was so many places to go, so many interesting things to see. I had never seen so much wonderful things before. The weekend before my grandpa had given me a whole 5 dollars, 5 dollars! Through the exploring I came across a Pog set, do you remember? Different types of slammers, putting your Pogs on the line with the hopes you would beat your friends. Someone was selling all their Pogs and slammers and a Pog board for 5 dollars! I couldn’t resist, I went and found my Mom and asked if I could get it. She said no, it was special money and I should save it for something better. But I couldn’t resist, I went against my Mom and bought that beautiful Pog set. Later that night I could be found locked in the bathroom crying, feeling shame because I had gone against my Mom and used Grandpa’s money poorly. You may laugh at this story, or think big deal, 5 dollars. But it’s a story that defined who I am. I laugh about it but a part of me still feels a tinge of shame. It’s amazing how that feeling can stay with us.

But there comes Jesus, seeing everything I have done, I am standing there bare before him, lying in a corner or a room trying to hide. He takes off his robe and gives it to me. He has already taken my shame.

I run into a room wanting to hide and be by myself, I know no one could love me now, let alone accept me. Jesus comes walking in and there I am in the corner of a dark room. Asks if he can be with me, gives me a robe and then takes me out back into the crowd. He is proud to be seen with me, He introduces me as his child. All my shame has disappeared I am no longer standing there exposed.

Mark 3:13-19

This passage describes the time when Jesus hand selected a team of twelve men who he gave the title of apostle. Jesus desired to spend time with his apostles, to be in community with a trusted group of confidants and like-minded friends. He also wanted to pass on his heart for lost and hurting people. I imagine he had a lot of hope and excitement in what this inner circle could do to advance the good news he came to proclaim.

The passage goes on to name the twelve that Jesus called. As I read this list of names I imagine a sports team, maybe hockey or basketball, where each player is announced as they take the ice or the court. You can feel the cheers as Peter, “The Rock,” takes his place. Here come James and John, “The Sons of Thunder.” Who wouldn’t get amp’d up knowing you had the Sons of Thunder on your team. Now Andrew, Philip, Bart, Matthew, and Thomas take their place. The arena is electric as Jesus closest team mates take their places around him. Thad is announced, James of Alphaeus, Simon the Zealot and finally Judas, “The Betrayer.” Huh!?

In my mind, maybe yours too, the mention of Judas is like a bucket of cold water in the face in light of all the other big-star apostles. As I read this passage a couple of times, I kept getting stuck on Judas. I realized that my heart felt sadness every time I read his name in the list of the all-stars. It dawned on me that I experience this passage from my side of history; I read this with the knowledge of what Judas did. When I mentally transport myself back to the moment that Jesus called and named the twelve apostles, it changes something. Judas in that moment was not Judas the betrayer; he was just Judas... and not only just Judas, but a man that Jesus believed in enough to call him into his closest community of friends. I wonder what must have been going through Judas’ mind as Jesus called him. What a rush. What an honour. Can you imagine being personally invited into Jesus inner circle? How exciting to be singled out and chosen personally by Jesus.

I can’t help but think that Jesus had every hope and belief in Judas when he invited him as one of the twelve. I also can’t help but believe that Jesus knew exactly how Judas would betray him one day. The sting of betrayal had to be exponentially more painful for Jesus because he trusted and believed in Judas enough to call him a friend and apostle.

Today I’m thinking of how often I am like Judas; how often I betray Jesus with my divided allegiance, how I desire to be so close to Jesus and how often I fight his leadership and betray his companionship. I’m also thinking about how guarded I am; how quickly I reject those who have betrayed me and how much energy I spend protecting myself from getting hurt again. I wonder if I can give myself permission to believe in people the way Jesus believed in Judas. Today I’m grateful to be reminded of Jesus unending gift of forgiveness, his graciousness, and his belief in me, a modern-day Judas.

The Temptations of Power

In getting ready to speak this weekend I came across a this name a couple times: Vaclav Havel. I think I've heard his name before, but after I reading the speech linked here, he's a new favorite. Give it a read. I bet you'll say the same thing.

Havel writes about the dark, seductive side of power. His primary application is politics, but if you allow it, I think his message will speak into any arena.

www.cs.utexas.edu/~vl/notes/havel.html

Those of us who lead others - who parent, coach, teach, whatever - generally start with a good motive for doing so. But Havel thinks we're always influenced by a second need. That need is to convince ourselves that we're significant. If we lack self awareness we won't know this motivation is there, and if we're not careful, the second need will overtake the first.

I've been thinking a lot about this in the last couple of days. Thinking about my own multiple motivations for leading like I do. This stuff messes with a person. Thanks God for the example of Jesus, who did not come to be served, but to serve. Who emptied Himself of His power and died on the cross for me, and gave me supreme example of what power ought to look like. Jesus shows what power is for: Giving...loving...serving.

He humbled Himself and died for you. That's where your assurance is supposed to come from.

The Father delights in me, this I know. I hope you do too.

Embarrass

You know the word. I suspect you also have felt the word. Embarrass is “to cause confusion and shame or to make someone uncomfortably self-conscious”. I remember being at swimming provincials at the Commonwealth Pool back in my teenage days and I was late for my race. I heard the last call over the loud speaker and I panicked. I whipped off my track pants and ran to my starting block only to look down and see that I did not have my swim suit on. The referee said my trunks looked like boxers – that’s because they were! A tough day. I was embarrassed.

I have also been embarrassed by the actions of some Christians – whether it be in history past or stories from the present day. I can think of a conversation I had with one server at a local restaurant where she said she hates working on Sunday because the church crowd is cheap and demanding. I was embarrassed again but this time in a deeper way. I’m sure I’ve been an embarrassment too sometimes.

On one hand we realize that people aren’t perfect and can’t act right all the time but what we might forget or not pay attention to enough is another definition of embarrass and that is “to put obstacles or difficulties in the way of”. What a tragedy it is that as we claim to be followers of Christ we might in effect be adding obstacles in people’s way as they seek to find truth and meaning in this world.

In the book of Colossians chapter two we are reminded that we are a chosen people, a holy nation, God’s own possession. It goes on to say this is so we can show others the goodness of God, for He has called us out of the darkness.

We should never tire of the challenge to be humble people who are open to God indwelling us and changing us to be more like Jesus.

We should never tire of hearing yet again that our God is a good God who is merciful and who forgives. What a great reason to follow.

Amen.

Can you hear that?

by Laurence Fernández

As some of you may know, I have two boys: Joshua, 8 and Caleb, 5. As they interact, play, and grow together, one may suggest a great piece of advice for the other, “Dad, you need to talk to Caleb because… or Dad, Joshua needs a time out because…”

I don’t know about you, but as God speaks to me, and I go through life and learn, sometimes I do the same. I am quick to think of who can really hear, or learn this. I find my self almost wishing “my lesson” to some one else.

I believe that God can use you and me, and He can direct us to speak insight, encouragement and strength into the lives of others. However, I believe that God wants my heart always attentively ready to hear and learn from Him.

In light of the current message series as well as my current life circumstances, am I willing to allow God to speak to through His word to me?

As this week comes to an end and we get ready for the next one, let’s take some time to ask God to speak to us. Maybe go to your favorite coffee house, or place you enjoy solitude and read the following passage from the book of John:

John 13:34-35
So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other. Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.” © New Living Translation

If God were trying to tell me something, would I know?

If God were reassuring me or challenging me, would I notice?

I ask for the grace to be free of my own preoccupations and to be open to what God may be saying to me.

“Our relationship with each other is the criterion the world uses to judge whether our message is truthful. - Christian community is the final apologetic” Francis Schaeffer