The Dreaded "C" Word

When you hear the phrase, the dreaded “C” word, what comes to mind? For many, it is the word “cancer”. That silent disease that unbeknownst to us can lie lurking, with the potential to overtake and destroy cells, organs and bodies. Once active it begins a quiet assault against good, strong and healthy cells leaving in its wake a mass of diseased tissue. Left unnoticed and unattended, over time it brings bodily breakdown, pain and can ultimately lead to death.

I am thinking these days of another “C” word that when left unchecked within the body of Christ can be just as subtle, just as destructive and deadly. It has the ability, power and potential to divide; to bring pain; and it will harm and hinder the health, vitality and functionality of the body. The “C” word I am referring to is very simply “confusion”. At first glance you might question why I would suggest this, but let me explain.

The more I am involved in other people’s stories and the longer I am a participant in the body of Christ, I see a theme emerging that clearly points to the destructive and negative nature of confusion. It is so often the root cause of relational discord, misunderstanding and can lead to division and isolation. It can so easily take us off the track of truth and skew authentic and original meaning. It can easily send up a smoke screen to blur our vision and our path and keep us from knowing how to navigate forward, immobilizing us in the end. It can fog and distort our thoughts, perceptions and emotions which may entice us to build a case against another, all out of inaccurate information, far and very different from the true purpose or meaning. Confusion can over time subtly destroy healthy environments, strong teams, and intimate relationships, leaving chaos in its wake.

How many relational problems begin as a result of something being said or done that causes the other person to walk away in a cloud of confusion. That in and of itself isn’t the issue – we are all prone to not explain ourselves effectively or doing things that can come across inaccurately. The problem begins though when we walk away and don’t address our confusion. This opens the door for our minds to twist and skew what has just taken place.  Over time if the confusion isn’t clarified it will build until it is impossible to see clearly and accurately any longer.

I have a friend who is diligent in this regard. Many times after I have interacted with them I will receive a call later on. A quick, but intentional conversation to clarify something one of us may have said. It has been sobering to realize how many times one of us was reading something in that was not reality at all. How freeing to know that in the end we are both on the same page and we never have to question or doubt or wonder any longer. We stop confusion in its track so that we can go forward unhindered and unencumbered.

In closing, here are a couple of thoughts…

• The opposite of confusion is ‘understanding’ and Psalm 119:130 says, “The unfolding of your Words give light; it gives understanding to the simple.” The first place to begin if we are confused is to seek Jesus and scripture, to ask for His counsel to sift and sort through the confusion in order to gain truth.
• Anytime confusion exists, especially relationally, it is both our right and responsibility to ask for, and seek clarity. A simple question or request for explanation can eliminate confusion before any misunderstanding sets in.
• Don’t let too much time go by before confronting confusion. Like cancer, early detection and elimination is critical. If not dealt with in a timely manner it has the ability to create chaos that will take intense time and energy to unravel.

Father, give us the ability to communicate clearly with others. Give us courage to do our part to eradicate confusion. Thank you Jesus that as we draw close to you and seek understanding, you are faithful to provide. Help us to live together in unity, clarity and understanding. Amen

Exposed, Yet Safe

As we have studied Genesis this fall I got stuck on the story of Noah and his sons. Not the most renowned chapters pertaining to the flood and the ark, but the account of this family following their return to life on land. In Genesis 9:18-27 we learn that once settled, Noah tried his hand at farming. He plants and harvests a vineyard and from the fruit of his labour discovers – and perhaps initiates – the art of wine making. One day he does some ‘extreme’ wine tasting which leads to Noah’s spiral in to an intoxicated state of drunkenness, and lies naked in his tent. His youngest son Ham enters Noah’s tent and finds his dad in this disturbing and exposed situation. Without doing anything to help his father’s circumstances, Ham walks out and shares what he has just seen with his older brothers Shem and Japheth. Without hesitation the older brothers drape a robe over their shoulders, walk backwards into Noah’s tent, and cover their father’s nakedness, not allowing their eyes to fall upon Noah’s exposed, weak and vulnerable state. When Noah awoke from his stupor and learns of Ham’s actions, he curses Ham’s offspring, bestowing a sentence of judgement upon them.

As I prayerfully thought through this text my mind was drawn to each of the four characters: Noah, Ham, and the older brothers, and I found myself relating to all four of them.

I have been in Noah’s circumstances in that there have been times when I have figuratively been vulnerable, exposed and weak before others. Times when I have willingly bared my soul, my past, thoughts, or fears with another and they in turn have left my presence and shared it with other people. As a result I have felt judged, betrayed and exploited in the process.

Sadly I can also relate to Ham where I have been the one who has been entrusted with an intimate moment in another’s life and did not steward it well. I have done nothing to help them but rather I too have left the scene and shared inappropriate information with others, violating trust. Their openness and rawness was not safe in my presence. How I regret and repent over my unloving and ungracious actions.
Like the brothers, I have been the third party, where confidential information has been divulged to me about someone. The question is what was my response? Did I eagerly participate in the conversation or did I instead do what I could to honour and respect, defend and cover, guard and protect the other person? While my desire is to follow the example of the Shem and Japheth, I know that hasn’t always been the case.

As I pondered this text I realized how extremely damaging this can be. Whenever we choose to replicate Ham’s actions, a wall of relational distrust is built amongst us. Overtime we learn it is not safe to expose ourselves, to be raw or vulnerable with others. We avoid entering in to community for fear of being wounded, yet again. We live isolated, masked and at arm’s length to others. As a result we miss out on authentic, deep and real community – the very essence of what God created us to enjoy and thrive within.

Dear Lord Jesus, from this day forward may our words, thoughts and actions prove that we can be trusted and that others are safe in, and out, of our presence. Heal us from past relational hurts and enable us to risk and trust again. Convict us when we are tempted to violate this principle. Amen.

Steak or Spam

Recently, as I read through Genesis 4 and the account of Cain and Abel I was drawn to verses 2- 4 (NLT): “When they grew up, Abel became a shepherd, while Cain cultivated the ground. When it was time for the harvest, Cain presented some of his crops as a gift to the Lord. Abel also brought a gift – the best of the firstborn lambs from his flock.”

What stood out to me from the text were two words: some…and best. Cain presented ‘some’ of his crops as a gift and offering to God, while Abel offered the ‘best’ of his flock.

I am from a farming background. My Dad was a grain farmer so I can easily relate to Cain’s grain offering. I recall that at harvest time the circumference of the field and the outside edge was generally the worst part of the crop. This area typically yielded the least return, produced the poorest quality of grain and had the greatest influx of weeds. It was often trampled, wind-blown and scorched. And while it produced ‘some’ grain  it generally contributed the least to the harvest. So much so in fact that in some cases Dad would invite a neighboring rancher to come and bail this part of the crop for cattle feed. It wasn’t worth the fuel it took to get in off the field. It was not too difficult, costly or much of a sacrifice to offer up and give away this portion of the harvest.

Contrast that with Abel’s offering of the lamb…the ‘best’ lamb. Although farmers, my family was not into cattle farming. However, each fall my parents would purchase a full ¼ or ½ of beef and have it cut, wrapped and put into the freezer to last my family through the winter months. All of us knew that there was one meal out of that batch of meat that we wanted to show up for…T-bone steak night. In our opinion, the ultimate cut from that animal. The loin the most tender, the meat next to the bone the tastiest. Mom would fry it up on the stove - in Crisco oil - and it was a feast adequate for a king. Delicious, mouthwatering, the very best!! No one wanted to miss out, be late or absent when T-bone was on the menu. At times Mom would invite others to join us for that special meal. It was always a very special opportunity when we were able to honor others by sharing and giving the very best we had to offer.

As I compared those two scenarios of offerings I thought about my life, my ultimate offering to God... and I asked myself whether I give God ‘some’ of my life, or the ‘best’ of my life? Do I offer up ‘some’ of my time, energy and resources… but stop before it begins to cost me personally? Do I offer my King steak or spam? Do I serve sacrificially or beneficially? Do I give God the best parts of all of me or do I withhold big chunks for self comfort, self preoccupation and self control?

Lord Jesus, I want to give you the very best I have every day…all day. Forgive me for the times I have kept the best for my selfish pleasure. Show me how to give away my life…the best of my life…for You and your Kingdom cause. Amen.

Child of God

Recently I was reading from Luke 2, the story of Jesus as a baby and a young boy at the temple. I was pondering what it must have been like for Jesus’ parents to manage the existing tensions of their son being fully God and fully human. On the one hand, seeing Him experience physical and intellectual growth as any normal human child would have, but also experiencing the supernatural favor of God in his everyday life in unusual and increasing measure.

I thought about Mary treasuring Jesus’ development, growth and maturity in her heart. No doubt she reflected on her encounters and conversations with the angel, Elizabeth, Simeon and Anna…all who verified that Jesus was the incarnate Son of God. Knowing in her heart His true identity and yet did she ever struggle with what she knew to be truth and what she saw playing out before her in their families day to day lives?

As Jesus’ parents I imagine there would have been moments of sheer awe and anticipation at the understanding of who their son was. Conflicting with moments of deep awareness that He was human, and so were they. I imagine they encountered insecurity in knowing that they with their limited human experience, capacity and ability they had been entrusted  to raise this God child. 

As I pondered  the text, I reflected on my role as a Mom and one who often struggles with tensions and insecurities of parenting in 2011. I asked myself whether in those moments of day to day living, when loving and parenting is stressful and difficult, do I remember that my children are a gift from God, a miracle in the making, and created in the likeness of Christ? A child of God. When I am frustrated with their seeming lack of growth and maturity do I remember that God is at work in their lives and He will complete the good work He has begun? When I am questioning their choices or decisions do I remind myself that God is Sovereign and has a destiny for each of His beloved children? And, He is the Master of taking circumstances, choices along with their consequences and utilizing them to draw His children to Himself.

When I am overwhelmed with my lacking of insight, wisdom, discernment as a parent….the list goes on…do I draw on the fact that God promises to work through my weakness’ and He is able to do more that I can humanly dream or imagine? The question I ultimately asked myself is how do I manage the tension of parenting my child in the midst of his/her humanity intertwined with their true identity as a son, or daughter, of God? 

As I pondered all those thoughts in my heart I found myself thumbing through the pages of my Bible, to 1 Cor 13, commonly referred to as the love chapter, my eyes fell to verse 13. “And now these three remain: faith, hope and love. But the greatest of these is love.”
I smiled to myself and thanked God for His Word. When it comes to my children I must hold to faith and remain sure of what I hope for and certain of what I do not see unfolding before me. I need constant hope that Christ who began a good work is faithful to carry it on to completion, right up until Christ’s return. And the greatest and most important thing I can choose…always… is to love. To love my children as Christ loves. And to remember that as much as I love my children…God loves them more. They are His children, loaned to me for a season, a privilege and responsibility that I must steward well but with ultimate dependence on God. 

What do you watch for?

 Earlier I was reading from the book of Mark where Jesus, in chatting with four of His disciples, responds to their questions of when the end will come and what the signs will be as it approaches. Jesus begins His reply with the word… ‘watch’ (Mark 13:5)


...and, He concludes the chapter with a single word… “WATCH” (Mark 13:36)! He uses other synonymous words throughout the text such as: Be on guard! Be alert! Keep watch!

I was challenged by that word ‘watch’ and asked myself… what do I typically watch for?

• Am I actively watching and anticipating Christ’s return, possibly even today, or is my gaze on my own self absorbed interests?
• Does the reality of Christ’s return truly cause me to live differently today – or not? 
• Do I engage with this day with an urgency for the salvation of others?
• Do I wake up each morning with the acknowledgment that this could possibly be my last day on earth? 
• Or, do I function with an entitlement attitude that says, “tomorrow ‘will’ be mine?” 
• What if I knew that the next 8 hrs – 8 days – 8 months – 8 years would be my last?
• What then, would I be watching for?
• What then would my priorities  – focus – attention be?

• Am I actively watching for Christ’s work around me and entering in to what He is doing?

Do I watch ‘out for’ those things that will take my attention off of Christ?

• Am I watching and on guard, fully aware of the distractions of life?
• Am I alert to what I am most susceptible to that will cause my gaze to shift off of my Creator and on to myself?
• Do I keep watch for incorrect attitudes/thoughts patterns that if left unchecked will take me off course?

Father, enable us today, to move through the moments and hours…watching. Watching with expectancy, with hope, with faith, and with joy. Watching for opportunities to extend your love, compassion and hope to this world. Watching out for those things that can subtly sneak in to divert our attention. Watching…

Amen.